She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
