The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
