Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
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