And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Couch. On fire.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
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