If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
