Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
