We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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