just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
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