i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
