You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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