Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Randomize
