I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Randomize
