I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize
