Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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