the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Randomize
