haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
