I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Randomize
