He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
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