She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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