Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
