mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Randomize
