so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
