even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
So much rum. So many feels.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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