I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
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