I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Randomize
