Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
