His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
