I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I have grass duct taped all over my body
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize