i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
