im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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