if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
