I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
