I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Randomize
