For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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