i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Randomize
