Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
