The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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