i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
operation harelip BJ is a go
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Randomize
