hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Randomize
