ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
