keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize
