He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
