now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
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