We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Randomize
