she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Me too!
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
