I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
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