dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Randomize
