Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Randomize
