One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Randomize
