she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
