your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
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